The Cable Containment System

Spent 3 hours organising cables on Day 184. Felt incredibly productive. Had organised exactly zero tasks that mattered. The cables looked amazing though.

The Cable Containment System is a silicone desk organiser that holds your charging cables vertically so they don't fall behind your desk. It took you longer to install than you'll admit. Your cables are now perfectly organised. Your work remains chaotically undone. These facts are unrelated.

What This Actually Is:

A weighted silicone cable management hub with 3, 5, or 7 slots for holding USB cables, charging cords, and other wires vertically at your desk. Premium silicone construction. Non-slip base. Built-in phone stand. The kind of thing that makes you feel like you've "upgraded your workspace" whilst avoiding actual work.

Will it make you more productive? No. Will you spend 45 minutes arranging cables in perfect symmetry? Absolutely.

The Three Versions:

3-Hole "Minimalist" - £9.99
For people who think they only need 3 cables. You don't. But optimism is free.

5-Hole "Realist" - £11.99
For people who've accepted they have more than 3 cables but refuse to acknowledge all of them.

7-Hole "The Truth" - £13.99
For people who've counted their cables and wept. This is the one you actually need.

What You're Getting:

• Weighted silicone cable organiser (your choice of size)
• Multiple vertical slots for cable management
• Non-slip rubberised base
• Integrated phone stand slot
• The satisfaction of organised cables

All Versions Include:

• Premium silicone construction
• Non-slip base
• Universal cable compatibility (USB-A, USB-C, Lightning, Micro-USB)
• Black finish (professional, discreet)
• Weighted design (won't slide around)

You'll spend longer organising your cables than you would've spent just... using tangled cables. But the organised cables will look incredible. And sometimes that's what matters.

You'll rearrange the cables by frequency of use. Then by colour. Then by cable length. Then alphabetically by device name. This is the spiral. The organiser enables it.

How This Actually Works:

Each slot holds one cable. You thread your charging cables through so the connector end hangs down, ready to grab. Your phone sits in the integrated stand. Everything is visible. Everything is accessible. Everything looks intentional.

Your desk suddenly looks like you have your life together. This is a lie. But it's a convincing lie.

Perfect For:

• People with 4+ charging cables on their desk
• Anyone who's watched a cable fall behind their desk and given up
• Desk aesthetic upgrades that feel "productive"
• Avoiding work by "organising your workspace"
• Video call backgrounds (looks professional)
• Gifts for colleagues whose desks are cable nightmares

Why It's Called The Cable Containment System:

Because "containment" sounds more impressive than "holder." Also because your cables are now contained. They can't escape. They can't fall. They're organised whether they like it or not.

Your life remains chaotic. Your cables are not. Small victories.

What Will Actually Happen:

Hour 1: "This will solve my cable problem!"
Hour 2: Threading cables through slots with intense focus
Hour 3: Stepping back to admire your work
Day 2: Taking a photo for Instagram with caption about "productivity"
Week 1: Reorganising cables by colour because why not
Month 1: Buying another one in a different size because one wasn't enough

The Cable Containment System doesn't judge this progression. It just contains cables.

Which Size Do You Need?

Count your desk cables right now. Actually count them.

• 3 or fewer cables? Get the 5-hole. You're forgetting cables.
• 4-6 cables? Get the 5-hole or 7-hole.
• 7+ cables? Get the 7-hole. Possibly two of them.
• "I don't know how many cables I have"? Get the 7-hole.

Nobody has ever regretted getting too many holes. Many people have regretted too few.